The ego is front row, centre for most of us when it comes to our core beliefs, our decision-making, our opinions, and our controlling paradigms. Essentially, the ego is busy protecting our inner child. That inner child is who we identify as “I”. I feel this or that; I believe, I am suffering, I have anxiety, I have internal challenges, I have urges I need to satisfy. You’ve heard me talk about our Inner Bully here on the show, and that inner bully is what holds us back, what causes us to make poor choices at times, that voice that tells us we’re not good enough in whatever way, whether it’s I’m not smart enough, I’m not wealthy enough, I’m not fast enough.
Our ego is that part of us that controls your value of self. It continues a running narrative based on our beliefs and thoughts about ourselves. These believes come from lived experiences from various places including parents, relatives, friends, teachers, and society.
The ego has a lot of power over us and it gets this power by interpreting our belief system and uncovering our deepest fears and sometimes our strongest confidence and courage.
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Protection From What?
As I said, the ego is protecting us from our inner child, and it never stops. It’s extremely alert and is always ready to defend itself and act on anything it sees as a threat. Anytime there are threats to the ego, the ego steps up and makes an effort to redirect us.
What happens that might be a threat to our ego? For a lot of us the answer can be one or more items on this list:
- showing a strong display of emotions
- making confident decisions
- jumping into extreme competition whatever that looks like for you
- feeling fear and moving forward anyway
- being a strong leader
Are You On Autopilot?
Your ego makes everything about you and what you believe. Anything going against those beliefs is seen by the ego as a threat. The ego’s goal is to diminish your worth and power. By doing that, it believes your inner child will remain safe.
Remember, the ego is something we all have as humans, and it is a necessary part of who we are. Having said that, it’s important to understand a little about how the ego works and how we can keep it in check.
As the title says, sometimes we have to tell our ego, “Enough Already”. You can work with the ego so you can improve your life. When we’re on autopilot, our ego takes control and does exactly what it wants to do. When we become aware of the ego, it will become less powerful over our thinking and our decisions.
What To Do
Here’s what to do to tell our ego, Enough Already:
- Become aware of your ego and realize you are not your ego. You and your ego are separate
- Have a friendly conversation with your ego. Finish this sentence … I am (blank). Notice what words come up for you after those two words, I am. Write down the words that came up for you following I am. Don’t judge what you wrote, just look at them with as little emotion as possible. If you do this various times throughout the day, you’ll start to identify the contents of your emotions and what’s holding you back. You’ll also start to identify your strengths.
- Give your ego a name. Giving it a name will help you have power over it and a better understanding of how it tries to control you.
- Book: The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle
- Book: Start Where You Are by Pema Chodron
- App: Insight Timer
- Living A Better Life with Jerzy Gregorek
- 463 Internationally Recognized Happiness Expert; Patti Montella
- 278 The Unified Mindfulness Approach with Julianna Raye
|Are you stressed and frustrated? It’s not hopeless. You can get through this. I’m Bruce Langford, a practicing hypnotist. I use hypnosis to fast-track people just like you to shed their inner bully and move forward with confidence. Book a Free Coaching Session to get you on the road to a more satisfying life, feeling grounded and focused. See me an email at firstname.lastname@example.org with ‘Ego' in the subject line. That way I'll know you heard this episode. We'll set up a zoom call and talk about how you can move forward to a better life. Send me an email at email@example.com|