• After 30 years of coaching, I now love breathing meditation. It took me a long time to get there. I always slightly controlled my breath. One of the tricks I used to begin uncoupling the technique was secretly matching my breath to my husband's.
• I didn't know what the rhythm of my breathing would be, so I had to pay close attention to another person's breath.
• Also, I have done this with a pet. It taught me not to be in control of my breath. Then I started doing breathing meditation as if I were that other person. I had to completely follow the breath, and I couldn't be even a tiny bit ahead of it.
  

Bullying Story

• I wasn't bullied myself, but I experienced childhood abuse at a very young age. My journey of healing has been alongside my husband, who was bullied. He often says that mindfulness saved his life.
• Bullying can be an isolated incident, a weekly occurrence, or even a daily ordeal. The real challenge lies in how we internalize it—sometimes we take on inappropriate shame or hatred for the bully.
• We often replay these painful stories in our minds.
• While society must address bullying, it's also crucial for individuals to move beyond the victim identity. Focusing our thoughts and attention away from the negative energy—whether self-hate or hatred for others—can be liberating.
• My husband, bullied for years, began to hate others and himself. Mindfulness taught him to sit with his feelings, no matter how difficult, and find peace in the present moment.
• This practice helped him recognize that he also experienced love and kindness.
• By bringing his attention back to the present, he could accept his past and choose to grow from it rather than remain trapped in a victim identity.